Cricket Commentary or Comedy Circus?

Some commentary fun:

Zaheer Khan bowls a bouncer and almost gets Younis Khan out.
Rameez Raja: He should surprise the batsmen by bowling that bouncer regularly.

How do you surprise somebody by being regular? Contradictory or am I thinking things?

Another cliche. Harbhajan comes onto bowl.
Rameez Raja (again): If he bowls well, India may win.

Thank God he didnt say, if India play well, they would win.

How about this one? It was a leg before appeal off Kartik's bowling.
Dhoni and slip fielder were keen. Murali Kartik was matter of fact.

What does the above line mean anyway? And yeah, it was Raja again.

A pearler from Arun Lal. Gambhir drives Anjum Rao for a boundary through the covers.
Arun Lal: There were five fielders there, but yet, Gambhir threaded the needle perfectly.

Threaded the needle? Wonder whether he thought it was Mark Taylor (Tailor) batting!

For more of such baffling comments. do tune in for the next match between India and Pakistan, on 8th November. I am sure they are not done yet.